I know that taking benzo's (xanax, ativan, valium) while pregnant can be very risky, as it causes some birth defects, however it also causes respiratory issues at birth, and the baby can be born addicted. It is also considered "Category D" in pregnancy".

In breast-feeding, I would be more worried that the baby would be experiencing the effect of the drug...i.e becoming tranquilized. The other concern is that the baby would develop a dependancy. I can't really advise you here or there to take it, however...I beleive that those are the stated known risks during breast-feeding.

On a personal level, I was taking Effexor when I first found out I was pregnant. My general practioner freaked out, and told me I needed to get off this med as soon as possible. So i taperd down, and came off the of med (it was hell. Its always hell). I went to a midwife appointment a few weeks ago, and my midwife was shocked that the doctor had me come of the med, as in her opinion the risk was "miniscule", and it was far riskier to have an un-medicated mother. I learned that day that there are very very different schools of thought when it comes to meds and pregnancy/breastfeeding. Is Dr. Hale the psychiatrist? The psychiatrist should have a greater knowledge of the drug and its effects....

Its a difficult place to be in. You need to think of your own sanity (literally) and your childs health, however the two are soo intertwined that its such a difficult desicion to make.

Well, the thing about doctors is that most of them know very little about breastfeeding; often they know less than their patients. So really I would disregard anything I heard from a doctor about nursing, or be at least very skeptical about it and consult an expert.
The experts in this situation are A) LCs and B) Medications And Mothers Milk. Since it sounds like they are both giving you the OK, then IMO if it's helping you the best thing is to continue to take it as you need it and ignore your doctor.

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"The words are being spoken now, are being written down; the taboos are being broken, the masks of motherhood are cracking through." Adrienne Rich, Of Woman Born

Dr Hale is one of the leading authorities on breastfeeding and medications, and the author of Medications and Mother's Milk which is regarded as a top resource by most LC's.

Oh, and N shows no sign of sedation when I take the med.. I really gave it my all nursing him when he was in the hospital and he did great.. I also felt better with him being on the monitors and everything.. no apnea or anything, and he was plenty active and alert even being sick. I figured with the LC's blessing, that was the best evironment to trial nursing him while on the xanax (he was at Children's for 5 days).

Its also worth mentioning, Im on a low dose and trying to taper off the meds.. I should be off within a few weeks if all goes well.

You are doing the right thing.You need to be at a functionable level and able to take care of the kiddos. Especially with N beign so sick all the time. He has no adverse affects from it and you're dr really doesn't know whats she's talking about. I wouldn't worry too much hun. You know how I feel about this whole thing from talking about it together. Im sorry i haven't been able to call you back. I feel really horrible and have been sleeping the majority of the days. I'll try and call you asap k? Hang in there hun!

No personal experience with it, but this webpage has links to some resources that might be useful to you:

http://www.kellymom.com/health/meds/antidepressant-ref.html