Complicated feelings about my wedding *priv. trigger*

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Complicated feelings about my wedding priv. trigger

I'm getting married on November 1st.

Everyone in my family is happy for me. My aunts in Chicago (where my parents live) are throwing me a bridal shower, which is totally awesome. But, it's weird.
No one threw me a shower when I had Zoe. Not even my mom. Everyone is getting so excited about the wedding, my aunts want to know about my dress, about the flowers, everyone asks me about the place, where we are going on our honey moon, and tells me congratulations and how lucky I am to have found Jack, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
Which is wonderful, don't get me wrong that I really apprecite their love and support. But, why is it that getting married is the thing they are getting so excited about? No one got excited about me having a baby. No one got excited about me becoming a mother.
It just sort of rubs salt into the wounds .. you know?

By katg at 09/25/2008 - 6:42am
Relationships
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I think about that alot. I

I think about that alot. I got married and no one was particularly happy for me then either. I wonder how it will feel when the next time I get married/ have a baby and people are super excited and supportive of me. Or what it will be like to walk around pregnant and not get dirty looks from strangers. Do you think there is a way you could bring it up to them and get them to apologize for the way they were when you had Zoe? Would that help you? I can imagine how hurtful it is that they are supportive of you now that you are doing the "right thing at the right time". People love weddings and people love babies, they just feel really threatened and act unreasonable when the timing scares them. Maybe you could try to incorporate Zoe and your motherhood into the wedding somehow. Like have a 'becoming family' ceremony that includes the three of you?

By adcaela at 09/25/2008 - 7:14am
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No one was super excited

No one was super excited like that about either of my children (one of which was born "in wedlock"), but everyone went crazy about the wedding (to obviously the wrong guy). I don't get it either. People are just weird about weddings I guess.

By MamaButterfly at 09/25/2008 - 11:14am
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I don't really want to bring

I don't really want to bring it up. They adore Zoe and have been very supportive of me in general. It's just weird. Jack and I are incorporating the creation of our family into our cerimony. That is going to be the main part of it -- us making our vows to each other and to Zoe, as a family. I'm making it very clear that this is a celebration of the creation of our family, not just two people deciding to become a family, but a family that was already in existance growing.

By katg at 09/26/2008 - 7:16pm
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