I feel that way too. I gained and kept a lot of weight when I had my kids. I look at pictures and cringe. I was waaaayyy too skinny before and a part of me knows that, but I miss when guys would look at me. I know I'm married but it feels good to know other men know you're good looking too ya know? I know there are things I can do to lose weight but I just don't have the energy to do it (I have an auto-immune like lupus) and I don't have the will power to keep up with it at that. My DH always tell me how beautiful I am, and when I tell him I wish I looked like I used to he always tells me I was waay to skinny and I looked like I was on drugs. Its like I don't here it and it doesn't make me feel better. Anyways I wrote more than I meant to, I was just trying to say that I know how you feel you aren't alone. Women in society today and told and shown over and over and over again that they should look a certain way, and that if you don't you're not as beautiful. Its ridiculous!!!! Women that are in those magazines, movies, tv shoes, models are not really beautiful. I mean not anymore so than a woman that has curves. I actually think curvier women are more beautiful! I think its been drilled into our heads so much that we should look a certain way that we are especially hard on ourselves and have a warped view of what we really look like, and a warped veiw of what is really beautiful. I think every woman is beautiful in her own way, every woman has their own unique part of them that is beautiful. I also think alot of those women who are in the spotlight look unhealthy. Another thing I have learned- while yes looks is what we consider is what makes someone goodlooking or not, but personality can make someone really beautiful not so much. This is something I realized first hand. Critter's best friend is absolutely gorgous! I used to have THE biggest crush on him! And then when I got to get to know him, he wasn't so good looking to me anymore, he was extremely cocky and that made his appeal much less than if he had been down to earth and fun. And not only that everyone has a differant perception of what they find beautiful. No one person sees someone the same way as another. And I read somewhere (can't remember where) that people don't take the whole person in. That when they think or look at someone they see certain features. My bil died last june and when I think of him, I can't picture his face as a whole, I remember his skin on the face (it was a little pockmarked from really bad acne) and his chin, and gotee. Anyways I've written a novel practically. I hope this makes sense and helps!

I used to get looked at by men, before I got pregnant. Now, I get a whole lotta nothing. And I am happy in my relationship...but that change, definatly makes me beleive that something is different. I like what you said about the features though. Everyone has a good feature!! I kind of wish we lived in a world, that placed little importants on looks. I

I definatley know how you feel. You should go see a therapist to talk about your perception of yourself. Comeing from someone who openly suffers with an eating disorder having a distorted image of yourself can do serious damage to your life and self esteem. Please talk to anyone because I know your beautiful and I hate to hear that you are having feelings like this.

I definitely second the idea to go speak with a specialist. I know just telling you you're beautiful wont help, if only it were that simple. It's not right to think you're the ugliest person in the room, or to feel held back by those feelings. The fact that you're even comparing yourself to others like that is a bit scary. There may be more deep reasons why you see yourself the way you do, and a therapist can help you figure out why and how to make it better. Good luck love.

Thanks all! Yeah, I know. Ive brought it up with my psychiatrist before, but he just kinda brushed me off. I should definatly enlist the services of an actual counselor/therapist. I would really like to solve these negative thinking patterns.